"Luke Warming and Loving It"
Luke 18:18-30
I dont know how to live a righteous life with the money I could potentially make in my job, in my career, in my investments. I dont know someone who can live this new life, this new vision I have for my life. This vision of small houses but big families (not necessarily related), a vision of welcoming others in who i have never met A vision of strength by being weak. I want to live overseas, not because it will further my career but because it will weaken it. If God tells me that my mission field is in China, then thats where I will go. If its Bangkok, the Middle East, Estonia, or even the "safety" of Peru...thats where I am next. My job wont be in jeopardy because of the riskiness of the job, but because of my strong commitment to Christ. I wont be able to work that much because i will be so busy sharing the gospel. My kids may very well not have a single dime toward their education when they go to college because all of it has already gone to God (but i will leave that for each of them to decide). I dont care if my kids are in daycare anymore, I was in daycare and I turned out decent....or at least okay. I dont care if my wife works or doesnt work, its her choice....its not like her income is going toward paying bills anyway, it is all going to God (or if she's not comfortable with that, then all my income is going to God). I dont want my money to be a crutch. I dont want to be defined by how much i have and how little I give. I want my life to be truly full. I want my life to be that of sacrifice and not of regret. If my heart, my money, my life is in God...if my calendar and checkbook line up with that which sets my heart on fire....then well, it will be on fire. My relationships will be so much more full.
There are three little verses in the book of Matthew that I mentioned in my testimony my senior year of high school when i was speaking to my YL group. I was a junior leader (one of the most challenging and rewarding things i have done in my entire life ironically....just the mere fact that i was out of my comfort zone for the entire time i was serving in that role, a place i am rarely challenged to be in unfortunately). Well its about a treasure in a field....I found it in high school buried in my heart, covered it up till i was ready to fully submit to it...but unfortunately that wasnt until about 5-6 weeks ago that i remember where i buried it. Where i basically was hit over the head with a shovel 2 1/2 months ago and i just laid there bleeding for almost a month. Then....with that tool that my friend gave me I was able to finally realize the opportunity that they put in my life. I was stripped bare before God, and that treasure I found was finally able to be rediscovered. Yes, I forgot the exact location where i had originally found it, but God found me. He brought it to me by bringing me into the light. I can do nothing apart from Him. He pursued me, He found me. And that shovel has turned from a scar into a tool. A reminder that when God puts special people in my life they are meant to be treasured as sons and daughters of Him. And then at the same time now it is my responsibility, not to throw the shovel away, or toss it back at the person who gave it to me...but to continue to help others bring to light their treasures in their lives. And to make a difference in this generation echoing into eternity.
Matthew 13:44-46
Matthew 5:1-12
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Matters
Psalm 42
Psalm 46
I feel like I have served myself and all my selfish desire for so long. My joy has been nothing but fleeting and my heart has been anything but loving. I have only really experienced perfect love through God alone but for so long I denied it. I passed it off, and with it I passed on all the blessings that He had sought to give me. My pride got in the way of His plan for my life, or what He was allowing for my life. I was scarred at what it seemed like life could be and now it is no more. How many times a day do I pass by God's blessings, His opportunities. There are so many amazing things in life that I am "too tired for" or "too scared to do" or "too afraid or embarrassed to say". I want it to be no more. I long for the confidence in God that only truly comes from Him. Its not that I need to know or want to know what God's plan is for my life, I just want to know that it is amazing. I want to share it with amazing Brothers and Sisters in Christ. Yes, I get the chance to speak to tons of friends for half hours or even hours a day but those guys dont get to see what i see. What truly makes relationships meaningful is not commonalities, its shared experiences. I want my friends to see what i see. I want to experience what they experience back in EL, or LA, or Minny. It just seems so right that I would have the ability to share with them, but unfortunately Cincy isnt that big of a draw from a "killer weekend" standpoint. Thats just all the more reason I want to take advantage of all the opportunities that I do have before I lose anymore forever. I want to be able to use all this energy I have for others. I want to make friends here in Cincy with people that matter. I want to make a difference by being a friend to all these people who I am just meeting and give them back so much of what they have already given me.
Sometimes I feel so constrained though. I want to be better friends with some people or spend more time with even others still but schedules dont allow it, circumstances dont allow it, or even just the face that priorities dont allow it. Sometimes it just seems like I'm on a different page than i want to be. I want to be on the next page or even pages years ago. Not that I have that many regrets, but i have some. And not that I dont want to live in the moment, but sometimes it seems like more exciting times are ahead ya know? It just seems like in the midst of my spiritual growth, i have such a conflict about what matters most. I want the here and now to matter but sometimes its just so frustrating whats going on. But is a crazy awesome circle, everything that makes me anxious, or sad, or longing for more just drives me back to God, which in turn allows me to have more growth in the future. It seems like the walls are caving in sometimes but then other times feel as though there is so much life in spite of the sorrow. It is because of my realization each and every day for a savior that i even have the opportunities to live free. That because of my utter need for God I can be set free for other things. Because while I have so many other passions in addition to God, He is the one that matters. And with that, I can now lay down those other passions at the feet, of the throne of Christ where I can truly be given them right back again. It is not till i give something up and God heals me of my unclean, unfocused, unGodly desire; that I am able to start moving forward with my life and with the blessing that from thence forth, my actions will be aligned with those of our Father.
Psalm 46
I feel like I have served myself and all my selfish desire for so long. My joy has been nothing but fleeting and my heart has been anything but loving. I have only really experienced perfect love through God alone but for so long I denied it. I passed it off, and with it I passed on all the blessings that He had sought to give me. My pride got in the way of His plan for my life, or what He was allowing for my life. I was scarred at what it seemed like life could be and now it is no more. How many times a day do I pass by God's blessings, His opportunities. There are so many amazing things in life that I am "too tired for" or "too scared to do" or "too afraid or embarrassed to say". I want it to be no more. I long for the confidence in God that only truly comes from Him. Its not that I need to know or want to know what God's plan is for my life, I just want to know that it is amazing. I want to share it with amazing Brothers and Sisters in Christ. Yes, I get the chance to speak to tons of friends for half hours or even hours a day but those guys dont get to see what i see. What truly makes relationships meaningful is not commonalities, its shared experiences. I want my friends to see what i see. I want to experience what they experience back in EL, or LA, or Minny. It just seems so right that I would have the ability to share with them, but unfortunately Cincy isnt that big of a draw from a "killer weekend" standpoint. Thats just all the more reason I want to take advantage of all the opportunities that I do have before I lose anymore forever. I want to be able to use all this energy I have for others. I want to make friends here in Cincy with people that matter. I want to make a difference by being a friend to all these people who I am just meeting and give them back so much of what they have already given me.
Sometimes I feel so constrained though. I want to be better friends with some people or spend more time with even others still but schedules dont allow it, circumstances dont allow it, or even just the face that priorities dont allow it. Sometimes it just seems like I'm on a different page than i want to be. I want to be on the next page or even pages years ago. Not that I have that many regrets, but i have some. And not that I dont want to live in the moment, but sometimes it seems like more exciting times are ahead ya know? It just seems like in the midst of my spiritual growth, i have such a conflict about what matters most. I want the here and now to matter but sometimes its just so frustrating whats going on. But is a crazy awesome circle, everything that makes me anxious, or sad, or longing for more just drives me back to God, which in turn allows me to have more growth in the future. It seems like the walls are caving in sometimes but then other times feel as though there is so much life in spite of the sorrow. It is because of my realization each and every day for a savior that i even have the opportunities to live free. That because of my utter need for God I can be set free for other things. Because while I have so many other passions in addition to God, He is the one that matters. And with that, I can now lay down those other passions at the feet, of the throne of Christ where I can truly be given them right back again. It is not till i give something up and God heals me of my unclean, unfocused, unGodly desire; that I am able to start moving forward with my life and with the blessing that from thence forth, my actions will be aligned with those of our Father.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Phil
Phil Mickelson just came in second place today in the US Open. But thats okay. He is now taking off time to spend with His family, with his kids and wife, and time to just get away from busyness of his agenda.
Yesterday in church they continued on with their series on the ten commandments and living in Christ as the fulfillment of God's Law. The fourth week was about remembering the Sabbath and keeping it holy, for we were not made for the Sabbath but rather the Sabbath was made for us. Sometimes I just need to take a break from everything. In fact God calls us to take a time out. He knows that we can't be at our best 24/7, we were only created to be at it 24/6 or even 12/6 or less! To say that we can handle working seven days a week is not only arrogant, foolish, and immature, it is disrespectful toward the God of creation. As a follower of Christ if I am not willing to fully give myself over to God in every occasion I do not give Him the proper place in my life where He will be honored. It is only when I see God continually that I am able to experience the joy that comes from a relationship with Him. And it is only when I take a break and live in the here and now, in the joy of today, that I can appreciate all that is in and around my life. Times at dinner are not about worrying what homework I need to finish later. Times at a movie are not for me to focus on what emails I need to send when I get home. And times when visiting with friends and family are not times to wish I had missed this or that opportunity for sleep. Yes, rest and responsibilities are important but too much will leave me burned out and vulnerable. And when I get burned out and vulnerable, I sacrifice relationships, friendships, and joys that I didnt want to in the first place. And I fall into a cycle of trying to work, or provide, for those things that I am missing out with in the end.
It took heartbreak, it took pain, it literally took God stripping me of all the physical possessions that I have in order to get my attention. I fell into that trap that my father fell into the same way, its just that I fell into it earlier. It cost both of us things that were precious in our lives that are most likely lost forever, but God has/and is bringing both of us through those parts of our lives. I have the benefit of it being earlier on in my life so that way God can reconcile me to myself without kids, friends, relatives, or least of all jobs being disrupted through the entire ordeal. It took God to expose my hurt, my wound as a man to light, to air. Like a laceration that was temporarily bandaged but never given time to heal, I was pained and hurt by my father and his work. In a much less severe way than many of my friends, "the cycle of abuse" hurt me mentally and my wound of letting others down due to my incapacity to see clearly the values in life just caused me to get thrown up, and a few times sober or drunk literally throw up my emotional pain in a physical response. It wasnt till 2, 3, or maybe 4 weeks ago that I knew what is/was most important in my life. And each day after God has broken me so much that I have cried out as Paul did just that God would call me home. It was in this abandonment that God picked me up. Not in a sense of suicidal thoughts, for I mean not to be insensitive to that in any way, but rather in a realization that I literally have nothing to look forward to in this life that my life with God in heaven will make me miss. There is no wealth, or number of vacations, or fast enough I4, v6, v8, v12 cars that can quench that insatiable desire for the peace of God and the warmth of his smile. The physical world, the physical hopes or desires that I currently have are those for opportunities to minister to the needs of my brothers and sisters around me. That I would have a bench to sit on, or a phone to call someone with. Not that it would be complicated or worrysome. My safety and security is in God and for my wife, friends, and family someday....the protection I can only hope to provide is that of emotional and spiritual support in the downturns of life that we might crave the Lord together. To rest in one another's arms and chests and brothers and sisters in Christ. The only thing from this world that we can take with us are our relationships, so why invest in anything else. The joy of my salvation is so great that I long to share it with others. My peace is beyond my own understanding and my only hope for obedience is found in Christ alone. I pray that the password into my heart might be the echoes of Psalm 46:10. And that the only work I would do on my Sabbath....a Saturday or Sunday; would be that which is the joy of serving others and not inanimate objects to build wealth and power. For my faith, my work, and my life should be full of faith such that it is so strong yet so little as Christ compares it to a Mustard seed.
Matthew 17:20
He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."
American Dream - Casting Crowns
Exodus 20:8-11
Yesterday in church they continued on with their series on the ten commandments and living in Christ as the fulfillment of God's Law. The fourth week was about remembering the Sabbath and keeping it holy, for we were not made for the Sabbath but rather the Sabbath was made for us. Sometimes I just need to take a break from everything. In fact God calls us to take a time out. He knows that we can't be at our best 24/7, we were only created to be at it 24/6 or even 12/6 or less! To say that we can handle working seven days a week is not only arrogant, foolish, and immature, it is disrespectful toward the God of creation. As a follower of Christ if I am not willing to fully give myself over to God in every occasion I do not give Him the proper place in my life where He will be honored. It is only when I see God continually that I am able to experience the joy that comes from a relationship with Him. And it is only when I take a break and live in the here and now, in the joy of today, that I can appreciate all that is in and around my life. Times at dinner are not about worrying what homework I need to finish later. Times at a movie are not for me to focus on what emails I need to send when I get home. And times when visiting with friends and family are not times to wish I had missed this or that opportunity for sleep. Yes, rest and responsibilities are important but too much will leave me burned out and vulnerable. And when I get burned out and vulnerable, I sacrifice relationships, friendships, and joys that I didnt want to in the first place. And I fall into a cycle of trying to work, or provide, for those things that I am missing out with in the end.
It took heartbreak, it took pain, it literally took God stripping me of all the physical possessions that I have in order to get my attention. I fell into that trap that my father fell into the same way, its just that I fell into it earlier. It cost both of us things that were precious in our lives that are most likely lost forever, but God has/and is bringing both of us through those parts of our lives. I have the benefit of it being earlier on in my life so that way God can reconcile me to myself without kids, friends, relatives, or least of all jobs being disrupted through the entire ordeal. It took God to expose my hurt, my wound as a man to light, to air. Like a laceration that was temporarily bandaged but never given time to heal, I was pained and hurt by my father and his work. In a much less severe way than many of my friends, "the cycle of abuse" hurt me mentally and my wound of letting others down due to my incapacity to see clearly the values in life just caused me to get thrown up, and a few times sober or drunk literally throw up my emotional pain in a physical response. It wasnt till 2, 3, or maybe 4 weeks ago that I knew what is/was most important in my life. And each day after God has broken me so much that I have cried out as Paul did just that God would call me home. It was in this abandonment that God picked me up. Not in a sense of suicidal thoughts, for I mean not to be insensitive to that in any way, but rather in a realization that I literally have nothing to look forward to in this life that my life with God in heaven will make me miss. There is no wealth, or number of vacations, or fast enough I4, v6, v8, v12 cars that can quench that insatiable desire for the peace of God and the warmth of his smile. The physical world, the physical hopes or desires that I currently have are those for opportunities to minister to the needs of my brothers and sisters around me. That I would have a bench to sit on, or a phone to call someone with. Not that it would be complicated or worrysome. My safety and security is in God and for my wife, friends, and family someday....the protection I can only hope to provide is that of emotional and spiritual support in the downturns of life that we might crave the Lord together. To rest in one another's arms and chests and brothers and sisters in Christ. The only thing from this world that we can take with us are our relationships, so why invest in anything else. The joy of my salvation is so great that I long to share it with others. My peace is beyond my own understanding and my only hope for obedience is found in Christ alone. I pray that the password into my heart might be the echoes of Psalm 46:10. And that the only work I would do on my Sabbath....a Saturday or Sunday; would be that which is the joy of serving others and not inanimate objects to build wealth and power. For my faith, my work, and my life should be full of faith such that it is so strong yet so little as Christ compares it to a Mustard seed.
Matthew 17:20
He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."
American Dream - Casting Crowns
Exodus 20:8-11
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Homeless Identity
Romans 5:12-21
1 Corinthians 15:12-34
So my movers came and packed up all of my worldly possessions yesterday. So I am in a very real sense homeless. I have sent in my forwarding mail address card such that as far as the governing body over my well being is concerned....I no longer reside in E. Lansing. So now I am enroute, or as of tomorrow at 11am....possibly later, to my new apartment which is empty but in a real sense full.
Last night I completely realized that I have nothing and currently own nothing that is more than my laptop (which is now 4+ years old) and the clothes on my back (plus 6ish other "outfits" that will have to suffice in the mean time). I have no fear about where my next meal is to come from...for I have more than enough in front of me. I have no struggle as to fresh water, or medical care, or even friends and family....for I also have all this in abundance. It is so weird to think that just a week ago I was concerned about filling up my new apartment with just the right items, or just the right stuff....ignoring the blaring-ly obvious signals and signs right in front of me. The love and safety; the rest and peace; the joy and assurance I have in Christ's death and resurrection is more than enough. My identity is not a job, its not a position, or a qualification. My identity isnt even my accomplishments, or the companion beside me (if and when God allows for a Christ-defining relationship). I got so distracted from the syntax of my life to say that as long as Christ was in the center of my life, relationships, or jobs then it didnt matter how big the part was. Christ needs to DEFINE who I am and what i put into my life and my jobs. Instead of seeing a relationship that has Christ as the glue, have the relationship be the splitting image of Christ. Not to put it as the center of the time together but to have it as the time together. To pray without ceasing doesnt mean to pray at the beginning, middle, and end of the day....it means to NEVER STOP PRAYING. To have Christ only be in my job when I am facing an ethical dilemma would be to exclude Him from so much of who I am and what I am trying to accomplish for Him. If I truly follow Colossians 3:23 then I should be heavenly minded throughout my day and in all work that I accomplish for Him who gives me strength. I should be looking at my places of influence, my positions, my areas of my life where I can truly make a difference, and use them to be Christ in those ways. I have nothing to fear for God will vindicate me in this world and be with me always, even if my actions in the world truly lead me homeless or even to the next.
Back in my sophomore and junior years of high school I was starting to learn about what did it mean to be defined by who God was in my life. I was beginning to learn from an Erwin McManus book called "Uprising" where it talks about how every man is on a journey to discover the passion that God has put in each of our hearts. Its not about worldly accomplishments but it is about getting to know the heart of the Father and the heart that He has uniquely placed in each of us. It is about trusting in Him to make all the pieces work together and teaching us the opportunities that lie ahead are meant to be taken grasp of with God's help. I forgot all the lessons that I learned from that book over the past 6-7 years and I shouldn't have. The fact that my identity was so backwards and away from God, forced me to sacrifice so many God-given opportunities and to squander many of my blessings. God calls me and each of us to not be defined as a Christian, which has come to mean so many things today from attending on Easter and Christmas to punching your ticket every Sunday before going to the bar to watch a sports game. Our day of rest has turned into a day or even a week of debauchery. I am as guilty as everyone else if not more. I have sinned in every way imaginable on Sundays as well as every other day of the week. My defining characteristics in God were of trying my best and not caring if it didnt work out in the end. My joy did not come from Him alone but by whatever the world told me I should be encouraged by. My old Adam had crawled its way back into my life such that ethics, morals, and priorities didnt match up with what my heart's true desire was. My life seemed so empty and off-kilter because it was. My balancing act was more like a deadly tight-rope performance than an actual rest in my Father's arms. But I have fallen and I have been caught by God. It took pain, it took humility, and it took a resetting of my heart's priorities...but now I can know that I literally have nothing now but God. I am alone with Him (especially since I just found out I wont have my move items till the 12th day of my 2-12 day moving spread). My joy is joy from Him. My love is flowing from His side. And my peace is that of His Spirit engulfing me and penetrating the weakest parts of who I am to expose them to the solidifying fire of the Lord's trials such that they may be refined and hardened in love through Grace.
It excites me to see where God is leading me next, or what friends I might meet along the way, or who God might strengthen my friendships with. I recently heard the quote that "Love is friendship on fire" which apparently is an older english quote from a while back but if that is true, then the only way for that fire to ignite (not even necessarily within a dating or marriage relationship) is for God to set it that way. For the fire that purifies and consumes everything is only from God. The fire that burns away the bad, useless items to leave only that which shimmers in God's eyes is what matters. And it is exciting to see what the next stage in my life will be, and what next God will set on fire now that He has started with my heart.
A quote from C.S. Lewis:
"Now at last they were beginning Chapter One of the Great Story which no one on earth has read: which goes on for ever: in which every chapter is better than the one before."
Another quote inspired by God:
Luke 12:13-53
1 Corinthians 15:12-34
So my movers came and packed up all of my worldly possessions yesterday. So I am in a very real sense homeless. I have sent in my forwarding mail address card such that as far as the governing body over my well being is concerned....I no longer reside in E. Lansing. So now I am enroute, or as of tomorrow at 11am....possibly later, to my new apartment which is empty but in a real sense full.
Last night I completely realized that I have nothing and currently own nothing that is more than my laptop (which is now 4+ years old) and the clothes on my back (plus 6ish other "outfits" that will have to suffice in the mean time). I have no fear about where my next meal is to come from...for I have more than enough in front of me. I have no struggle as to fresh water, or medical care, or even friends and family....for I also have all this in abundance. It is so weird to think that just a week ago I was concerned about filling up my new apartment with just the right items, or just the right stuff....ignoring the blaring-ly obvious signals and signs right in front of me. The love and safety; the rest and peace; the joy and assurance I have in Christ's death and resurrection is more than enough. My identity is not a job, its not a position, or a qualification. My identity isnt even my accomplishments, or the companion beside me (if and when God allows for a Christ-defining relationship). I got so distracted from the syntax of my life to say that as long as Christ was in the center of my life, relationships, or jobs then it didnt matter how big the part was. Christ needs to DEFINE who I am and what i put into my life and my jobs. Instead of seeing a relationship that has Christ as the glue, have the relationship be the splitting image of Christ. Not to put it as the center of the time together but to have it as the time together. To pray without ceasing doesnt mean to pray at the beginning, middle, and end of the day....it means to NEVER STOP PRAYING. To have Christ only be in my job when I am facing an ethical dilemma would be to exclude Him from so much of who I am and what I am trying to accomplish for Him. If I truly follow Colossians 3:23 then I should be heavenly minded throughout my day and in all work that I accomplish for Him who gives me strength. I should be looking at my places of influence, my positions, my areas of my life where I can truly make a difference, and use them to be Christ in those ways. I have nothing to fear for God will vindicate me in this world and be with me always, even if my actions in the world truly lead me homeless or even to the next.
Back in my sophomore and junior years of high school I was starting to learn about what did it mean to be defined by who God was in my life. I was beginning to learn from an Erwin McManus book called "Uprising" where it talks about how every man is on a journey to discover the passion that God has put in each of our hearts. Its not about worldly accomplishments but it is about getting to know the heart of the Father and the heart that He has uniquely placed in each of us. It is about trusting in Him to make all the pieces work together and teaching us the opportunities that lie ahead are meant to be taken grasp of with God's help. I forgot all the lessons that I learned from that book over the past 6-7 years and I shouldn't have. The fact that my identity was so backwards and away from God, forced me to sacrifice so many God-given opportunities and to squander many of my blessings. God calls me and each of us to not be defined as a Christian, which has come to mean so many things today from attending on Easter and Christmas to punching your ticket every Sunday before going to the bar to watch a sports game. Our day of rest has turned into a day or even a week of debauchery. I am as guilty as everyone else if not more. I have sinned in every way imaginable on Sundays as well as every other day of the week. My defining characteristics in God were of trying my best and not caring if it didnt work out in the end. My joy did not come from Him alone but by whatever the world told me I should be encouraged by. My old Adam had crawled its way back into my life such that ethics, morals, and priorities didnt match up with what my heart's true desire was. My life seemed so empty and off-kilter because it was. My balancing act was more like a deadly tight-rope performance than an actual rest in my Father's arms. But I have fallen and I have been caught by God. It took pain, it took humility, and it took a resetting of my heart's priorities...but now I can know that I literally have nothing now but God. I am alone with Him (especially since I just found out I wont have my move items till the 12th day of my 2-12 day moving spread). My joy is joy from Him. My love is flowing from His side. And my peace is that of His Spirit engulfing me and penetrating the weakest parts of who I am to expose them to the solidifying fire of the Lord's trials such that they may be refined and hardened in love through Grace.
It excites me to see where God is leading me next, or what friends I might meet along the way, or who God might strengthen my friendships with. I recently heard the quote that "Love is friendship on fire" which apparently is an older english quote from a while back but if that is true, then the only way for that fire to ignite (not even necessarily within a dating or marriage relationship) is for God to set it that way. For the fire that purifies and consumes everything is only from God. The fire that burns away the bad, useless items to leave only that which shimmers in God's eyes is what matters. And it is exciting to see what the next stage in my life will be, and what next God will set on fire now that He has started with my heart.
A quote from C.S. Lewis:
"Now at last they were beginning Chapter One of the Great Story which no one on earth has read: which goes on for ever: in which every chapter is better than the one before."
Another quote inspired by God:
Luke 12:13-53
Sunday, June 14, 2009
I pray this isnt me someday
I really like PostSecret ever since I was in high school when my friend Andy showed it to me. I have no idea where this one came from but it is kinda cool and apparently it has the Cincinnati skyline.
I am excited and scared at the same to move down to Cincy and start my new job with Procter and Gamble. I just dont want to live with any regrets. Regrets about what I didnt do today, what I should've done yesterday, or what I couldnt do tomorrow. I want my life to be within God's plan...and I want happiness. I dont want to live a life that is easy, but I desire so greatly the joy of the Lord. To fight away a world of depression for a God of love. To escape a world of lies for a world of integrity. A world where truth and shared experiences with the Father and with those I love is what truly motivates me. A life that isnt about pain and loneliness and wishing things differently. I want a life, a world of availability....yes of second changes, of reconciliation and renewal...but of a willingness to change from the inside out and to see that in others. An openness to new experiences that might seem familiar but are still new and exciting. I already worked at Motorola, I am sure that my Procter and Gamble experience will be similar but at the same time totally new. I already moved to a new city that I didnt know anyone in, and it worked out great being all alone anyway. Why wouldnt the same new experience work out just as great. My only fear is that my greatest flaw, my perpetual thorn that I really have only detested for the past month and a half, my lack of interpersonal dependence will somehow leave me how it did in Chicago. One of my friend's visited me in Chicago last fourth of July. It was really sweet to see him and really encouraging, but without certain people in my life he said that I changed. I long for change in the world and in myself. But I had lost the best part of myself for those 10 weeks that I was different prior to that. That I had no passion, was angry, and was really just weak. I dont want to have that same regret again. I feel myself slipping there more and more each day. I dont want my heart to harden toward parts of the world but it seems like it is the only way to deal with some things. I dont want to experience pain but it seems like the only way to avoid it. My relationship with God is the best it has been in a long time but it seems like I am losing myself. That I am in a routine, that my passion is gone, that in the near future I will have regrets. That in the end it will end up in a lie like in Chicago. It will end up will a shell of emptiness that no one can see but God.
Post Secret
But at the same time I hope that this IS me someday...today!
Getting There - My Utmost for His Highest
I am excited and scared at the same to move down to Cincy and start my new job with Procter and Gamble. I just dont want to live with any regrets. Regrets about what I didnt do today, what I should've done yesterday, or what I couldnt do tomorrow. I want my life to be within God's plan...and I want happiness. I dont want to live a life that is easy, but I desire so greatly the joy of the Lord. To fight away a world of depression for a God of love. To escape a world of lies for a world of integrity. A world where truth and shared experiences with the Father and with those I love is what truly motivates me. A life that isnt about pain and loneliness and wishing things differently. I want a life, a world of availability....yes of second changes, of reconciliation and renewal...but of a willingness to change from the inside out and to see that in others. An openness to new experiences that might seem familiar but are still new and exciting. I already worked at Motorola, I am sure that my Procter and Gamble experience will be similar but at the same time totally new. I already moved to a new city that I didnt know anyone in, and it worked out great being all alone anyway. Why wouldnt the same new experience work out just as great. My only fear is that my greatest flaw, my perpetual thorn that I really have only detested for the past month and a half, my lack of interpersonal dependence will somehow leave me how it did in Chicago. One of my friend's visited me in Chicago last fourth of July. It was really sweet to see him and really encouraging, but without certain people in my life he said that I changed. I long for change in the world and in myself. But I had lost the best part of myself for those 10 weeks that I was different prior to that. That I had no passion, was angry, and was really just weak. I dont want to have that same regret again. I feel myself slipping there more and more each day. I dont want my heart to harden toward parts of the world but it seems like it is the only way to deal with some things. I dont want to experience pain but it seems like the only way to avoid it. My relationship with God is the best it has been in a long time but it seems like I am losing myself. That I am in a routine, that my passion is gone, that in the near future I will have regrets. That in the end it will end up in a lie like in Chicago. It will end up will a shell of emptiness that no one can see but God.
Post Secret
But at the same time I hope that this IS me someday...today!
Getting There - My Utmost for His Highest
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Correct Definition?
Tim McGraw - Back When
Witness (n); public affirmation by word or example of usually religious faith or conviction
How many words, thoughts, definitions have been skewed over the years to not mean what they were supposed to? I think the Tim McGraw Song Link at the top basically sums up how screwed up the bottom pic and link are.
http://kingjamesgospel.com/
Witness (n); public affirmation by word or example of usually religious faith or conviction
How many words, thoughts, definitions have been skewed over the years to not mean what they were supposed to? I think the Tim McGraw Song Link at the top basically sums up how screwed up the bottom pic and link are.
http://kingjamesgospel.com/
Saturday, June 6, 2009
Your Name
Your Name - Phillips Criag and Dean (or The Swift is a good version too)
I was driving home today from E.L. after a very encouraging hang out time with one of my sweet friends and all I could do for a majority of my trip of proclaim praises to God. I just wanted to dance in my car and jump up and down, and I tried my best to do just that (for cruise control is certainly from God). One of my friends taught me how to translate the words of meaningful songs into sentences that touch my heart and this is what I gained from this song. May these verses and lyrics touch your heart as they did mine.
As morning dawns and evening fades, - As each day passes as if it were a mere mist before the eyes of our Lord (James 4:14)
you inspire songs of praise that rise up from Earth to touch your heart and glorify your name. - There are just sometimes that I cannot contain my love and joy for God, the mere mention of His name or thought of His greatness makes me call out loudly to Him(Luke 19:40)
Your name is a strong and mighty tower, - It is the focal point for all to see and experience. It is a light that extends out so all can see its greatness! (Psalm 61:3)
Your name is a shelter like no other, - The very identity of Jehovah is contained within His name. The security of His love and salvation are for all to hear, see, and experience. And the wholeness that is felt when surrounded by that security is nothing to balk at.(Psalm 61:4)
Your name - let the nations sing it louder, - Just as the nations tremble before the Lord and His voice, so too the nations repeat the chorus of the angels such that God's glory proclaimed and echoed against the mountains and across the seas(Psalm 105:1)
For nothing has the power to save but your name.- For our Lord is the only true way, truth, and life. And it is through Him and seeking our salvation through Him that we are set free. That in Him we find everything our heart desires. (John 6:68)
Jesus, in your name we pray, come and fill our hearts today,- For we cannot fill our hearts with things or other people, but God can fill our hearts with the love of other brothers and sisters through our faithfulness and obedience toward Him. (Luke 11:2)
Lord, give us strength to live for you and glorify your name. -Even when I am downtrodden and weak, God is strong. Even when the world comes crashing down on top of me, the Lord is my shelter through the storm. It is then that the Lord fully glorifies Himself through me as the vessel. For where I end, He begins...it is only up to me to end as soon as I can to humbly submit to God's power and majesty. (2 Thessalonians 1:12)
And there is healing in your name, - Healing from pain, from loneliness, and from discouragement. For God will never forget us or forsake us. If we seek acceptance first from anyone other than our Father we are nothing. But if we seek God's glory first....it is then that we receive all other things our mind, body and spirit desire (Isaiah 6:10)
Salvation in your name,-The very name of Jesus gives me freedom, safety, and joy. The peace that comes from Him alone is the saving grace in times of trouble. It is His joy and hope that continues to encourage me toward purity, obedience, and life in him alone. (Psalm 62:1-8)
There is joy in your name, - It is only in my Lord that I am truly alive. It is only by seeking His heart that I can find mine. And it is only by abiding in His perfect plan that I can find joy, even amongst persecution, distress, or uncertainty. (Psalm 35:9)
Jesus, in your name. -For we must all hail the power of Jesus' name. In Him alone do I find my salvation and joy. It is Him alone that reunites me with the Father and makes me whole again. The joy and strength that comes from trusting in Him is unmatched by even the greatest of all things created by man. For my relationships are most full when given to God and consecrated in Christ's holy name. For at Jesus' feet I lay all my desires, pain, goals, and struggles...to pick up my cross and live a life I can only hope is worthy of Him (Philippians 2:10)
Wow, what a mighty and powerful God do we serve. To Him be all the glory forever and ever Amen.
I was driving home today from E.L. after a very encouraging hang out time with one of my sweet friends and all I could do for a majority of my trip of proclaim praises to God. I just wanted to dance in my car and jump up and down, and I tried my best to do just that (for cruise control is certainly from God). One of my friends taught me how to translate the words of meaningful songs into sentences that touch my heart and this is what I gained from this song. May these verses and lyrics touch your heart as they did mine.
As morning dawns and evening fades, - As each day passes as if it were a mere mist before the eyes of our Lord (James 4:14)
you inspire songs of praise that rise up from Earth to touch your heart and glorify your name. - There are just sometimes that I cannot contain my love and joy for God, the mere mention of His name or thought of His greatness makes me call out loudly to Him(Luke 19:40)
Your name is a strong and mighty tower, - It is the focal point for all to see and experience. It is a light that extends out so all can see its greatness! (Psalm 61:3)
Your name is a shelter like no other, - The very identity of Jehovah is contained within His name. The security of His love and salvation are for all to hear, see, and experience. And the wholeness that is felt when surrounded by that security is nothing to balk at.(Psalm 61:4)
Your name - let the nations sing it louder, - Just as the nations tremble before the Lord and His voice, so too the nations repeat the chorus of the angels such that God's glory proclaimed and echoed against the mountains and across the seas(Psalm 105:1)
For nothing has the power to save but your name.- For our Lord is the only true way, truth, and life. And it is through Him and seeking our salvation through Him that we are set free. That in Him we find everything our heart desires. (John 6:68)
Jesus, in your name we pray, come and fill our hearts today,- For we cannot fill our hearts with things or other people, but God can fill our hearts with the love of other brothers and sisters through our faithfulness and obedience toward Him. (Luke 11:2)
Lord, give us strength to live for you and glorify your name. -Even when I am downtrodden and weak, God is strong. Even when the world comes crashing down on top of me, the Lord is my shelter through the storm. It is then that the Lord fully glorifies Himself through me as the vessel. For where I end, He begins...it is only up to me to end as soon as I can to humbly submit to God's power and majesty. (2 Thessalonians 1:12)
And there is healing in your name, - Healing from pain, from loneliness, and from discouragement. For God will never forget us or forsake us. If we seek acceptance first from anyone other than our Father we are nothing. But if we seek God's glory first....it is then that we receive all other things our mind, body and spirit desire (Isaiah 6:10)
Salvation in your name,-The very name of Jesus gives me freedom, safety, and joy. The peace that comes from Him alone is the saving grace in times of trouble. It is His joy and hope that continues to encourage me toward purity, obedience, and life in him alone. (Psalm 62:1-8)
There is joy in your name, - It is only in my Lord that I am truly alive. It is only by seeking His heart that I can find mine. And it is only by abiding in His perfect plan that I can find joy, even amongst persecution, distress, or uncertainty. (Psalm 35:9)
Jesus, in your name. -For we must all hail the power of Jesus' name. In Him alone do I find my salvation and joy. It is Him alone that reunites me with the Father and makes me whole again. The joy and strength that comes from trusting in Him is unmatched by even the greatest of all things created by man. For my relationships are most full when given to God and consecrated in Christ's holy name. For at Jesus' feet I lay all my desires, pain, goals, and struggles...to pick up my cross and live a life I can only hope is worthy of Him (Philippians 2:10)
Wow, what a mighty and powerful God do we serve. To Him be all the glory forever and ever Amen.
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